Nancy Grace is a human parasite. She feeds off of tragedy and human misery to boost her ratings while at the same time positioning herself as a crusader for justice. The results of her crusades speak for themselves, although plenty of other people have spoken about them, too. In short, she’s a terrible person. But terrible people often make for some pretty hilarious Twitter accounts, and Nancy Grace’s Twitter account is the crème de la crème of awfulness.
It’s doubtful that Nancy Grace runs the Twitter account for her show herself. There is probably some underpaid intern doing it for her. That intern is either just as terrible as she is or one of the world’s foremost comedic geniuses. I want to believe it’s the latter, because some of the tweets coming from the account or so sublimely absurd that they seem almost like a meta-commentary on the state of discourse in social media.
The best part of these tweets is often the hashtags included at the end of them. Hashtags, of course, are used to track conversations on Twitter, or in some cases just provide fodder for some excellent and not-so-excellent jokes. The Chris Hardwick-hosted @Midnight on Comedy Central makes excellent use of hashtags, employing them as a springboard for joke contests on the show itself and getting viewers involved on Twitter. Nancy Grace uses hashtags more as micro-headlines, basically turning them into an ultra-compressed version of what tabloids do much less efficiently but no less tastelessly.
Here are examples of some of the most hilariously awful use of hashtags from Nancy Grace’s Twitter account:
I was actually thinking of getting the twins a gerbil or a hamster—but forget it #RatBiteFever
— Nancy Grace (@NancyGraceHLN) February 27, 2014
That Tweet is funniest out of context, but even in context it never rises above ridiculous sensationalism. It’s the sort of scare-mongering the media has often been accused of, and a search by that hashtag reveals that number of other media outlets also used it in reference to the same story. That doesn’t make Nancy Grace any less ridiculous; it only makes those other outlets more ridiculous.
A family purchased a bottom round steak from Walmart. Little did they know, their dinner was allegedly laced with LSD! #LSDSteak
— Nancy Grace (@NancyGraceHLN) March 11, 2014
That quote seems like it’s straight out of an issue of Weekly World News, but it was also picked up by a number of other news outlets.
She’s not angry or bitter: “She did such a wonderful thing for me and left me in a warm, dry place… I want to thank her.” #BurgerKingBaby
— Nancy Grace (@NancyGraceHLN) March 7, 2014
That’s just the worst advertisement for Burger King I’ve ever seen.
Are you telling me she’s injecting people with their own blood—and she wasn’t even licensed to perform this procedure?! #VampireFaceLift
— Nancy Grace (@NancyGraceHLN) March 20, 2014
If “Vampire Face Lift” doesn’t end up as a wildly popular novelty Halloween song, there is no justice in the world.
Were these parents encouraging their baby son to smoke pot with them!? #PotAndTots
— Nancy Grace (@NancyGraceHLN) March 21, 2014
And there we go. Nancy Grace took what is a pretty horrific story (a two year-old dying in a house fire), injected some wild and completely unfounded speculation about the parents making the child smoke pot, and then condensed it all into one of the most ridiculous hashtags Twitter has ever seen.
That is pretty much her M.O. in a nutshell right there. A search by the #PotsAndTots hashtag on Twitter shows that reaction to it was a mixture of disgust and dumbfounded amusement, which is entirely the appropriate reaction. The world would be a better place if Nancy Grace were off the air, but as long as we’re stuck with her we might as well enjoy the macabre hilarity of her tonedeaf tweets.