How to Grieve

Charlie Brown, Grieving Good

Let me tell you about one of the worst things I’ve ever done. I was a freshman in college when my first grandparent died. It was my grandfather on my father’s side. I was going to school in Worcester, Massachusetts at the time, and my grandparents had lived in Maine. My parents were flying out from Michigan to attend the funeral, and they flew into Worcester so they could pick me up there and we could all drive up to Maine together. Continue reading

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Five Alternate Endings for Last Friday Morning

Last Friday morning was a difficult one. A little after nine months after separating from my wife, I finally made the soul-crushing journey down to the local circuit court to file for divorce. It was an overwhelming experience in many ways. It was expensive. The paperwork was confusing. And worst of all, it meant I could no longer be in denial that our marriage was over. Continue reading

Death or Something Like It

Last night I walked around downtown Grand Rapids, feeling like a ghost who was haunting the city. You don’t have to die to leave your life behind; people do it all the time for different reasons. You can build up an idea of who you are, what your identity is, and have it pulled out from underneath you like the tablecloth in a cheap parlor trick. You’re left suspended in air for that brief moment before—like Wile E. Coyote in a Road Runner cartoon—you realize with horror that you’ve been defying the laws of physics. Then when you finally hit the ground, it doesn’t feel like you’ll ever get back up. Continue reading

Me, My Mom, and the Terminator

Terminator 2 - Sarah Connor

One of my fondest memories of my mother involves killer robots. It was early July, 1991, and by some set of circumstances I can’t recall my father and sister were not home that day. It was just me and my mom. She made me my favorite dinner (spaghetti and meatballs) and asked if there was a movie I would want to go see. I answered without hesitation: Terminator 2. Continue reading